Window Shields



A warrior crouching with a round shield.

DJ Wang better late than never has some news:

HEY! Sorry for the lack of updates. Truly I am.

I got caught up in some things and so did DJ Benvenuto... and so did another certain DJ... his name begins with a Hadoken. I hope I didn’t give away anything.

Well, here is a big one so you are sure to enjoy this...

Today at school we had an art fair. It was rather dumb. I managed to skip out of 2/3’s of the school day.

I sat with DJ Benvenuto and DJ Real the whole time. They were doing origami (Japanese paper folding, for all you Hulk Smashes out there). I went up to DJ Real and asked him to make me an origami “lady’s nether region”.

AND HE DID! It rocked!

That was one of a couple of the highlights of the day.

Here is another one that took place after school.

Guy the Manager, DJ Fuji, DJ Benvenuto, DinoGirl and myself were walking to DJ Hadoken’s house to “surprise” him.

Before departing on our journey we partook in some petty vandalism (DinoGirl wasn’t involved. She is scared of petty vandalism).

We were able to liberate an entire window from the school. It was metal! We also found a wooden one that we also liberated. And on top of that we found this HUGE metal sheet / plank. It looks like a giant tower shield.

We had unknowingly (or perhaps it was The Ancients guiding us?) armed ourselves for what was about to happen next.

Well, as we were walking to DJ Hadoken’s house we encountered some puny humans riding around in their daddy’s BLUE SUV. Yes, we know your car!

They came at us and threw some eggs... but they missed really bad. So they came around for another pass and missed again. These people are really sad.

They missed mainly due to the fact that DJ Benvenuto had an idea. He remembered the scene in Gladiator with the shields. So we used the windows that we had liberated from the school as shields. Only one egg actually connected and that was with Guy the Manager’s shield.

Well, here comes the third pass. Third time’s the charm right? Wrong. The egg bomber attempted to open the car door to rush us but fell out of his friend’s car instead and nearly got run over. That was pretty funny.

Somehow the eggs that he was holding had not broken. So he got up and rushed up to me and although he was no more than four feet from me he missed the first throw and then threw again only for the egg to bounce off my shoulder and hit the ground unbroken.

What a lamester... can’t even throw right.

So DJ Fuji picked up that unbroken egg and proceeded to chase after the guy with it.

Believe me that was a sight to see. DJ Fuji doesn’t look like a runner but he is as fast as an “eager traveler” a mile away from the border.

They proceeded to go back to where they came from: RICH BASTARD HIGH SCHOOL.

That’s right, they go to Rich Bastard High School... how do we know?

Because these people have the brain of a Hulk Smash with a severe case of lame.

They wore their school uniforms on their little egg-fest.

So in the end we walk with our dignity and the joke’s on them.


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